The closer we get to Halloween, the more it makes me think of all of the things that made Halloween great throughout my life. The parties and decorations, the Halloween sit-com specials on tv (I have a ritual to watch all of my favorites every year… especially the Roseanne specials) and, of course watching horror movies constantly! I have had an interest in terrible horror movies for about a decade, now, so I feel I’ve gathered enough useless knowledge to share with you a list of some of the absolute best worst movies I’ve come across over the years. Don’t take that the wrong way, though. When I say these movies are awful, they are, but in a good way. So I am still recommending that you see them regardless of how absolutely terrible they are. Nay, I demand you see them! I’m sure you’ll notice a listing or two on here that you’ll remember, but I also hope that you’ll find a couple of movies that you’ve never seen before that you will add to your Netflix queue immediately in honor of the upcoming “Month of Macabre”.
10. Leprechaun in the Hood– Circa 2000, this movie is one of the absolute worst movies I have ever seen. First of all, the idea is completely absurd, but it makes of enough hilarity to make you spray milk (or beer… whichever your poison is) out your nose. With big stars like Ice-T and Coolio, this film had plenty of backing to be a hit, and in a way it did… if you can call being the “best of the worst” a good thing.
9. Ghoulies I and II- Circa 1985-1988. It’s no secret that in the 80’s there was a bit of an obsession with “small creature horror” with films like Critters (1986) and Gremlins (1985) so there was no question of success when Luca Bercovici began working on the movie Ghoulies. Well, needless-to-say, the Ghoulies movies received plenty of fame for being “not very good”, but it is certainly worth the watch for amusement purposes.
8. Jason X– Circa 2001. This was the 10th and, so far, the final movie in the Friday the 13th series (not counting Freddie Vs. Jason since it is not really part of the series). I say “so far” because it was released not one, not two, but SIX movies after Friday the 13th: The Final Chapter, which released in 1984. I love the “Jason” series and Jason X was no disappointment in the area of “camp”. Chock full of ridiculous quotes and great killings, it is worth the watch the next time they show it at 11am on a Tuesday when you are playing hooky from work.
7. Leprechaun 4: In Space- Circa 1997. While we are on the subject of sci-fi, why not take another trip into the completely absurd with Leprechaun 4: In Space! As if the Leprechaun series wasn’t ridiculous enough, someone said “Hey, ya know what would make this garbage even better? Why don’t we send the Leprechaun into space?” What an incredible awesome and completely ridiculous idea. While this movie make a hilarious watch (especially if you’ve been drinking), I would recommend spending your time watching the Alien movies first (because they are a better way to spend your time). However, if you are like me, you will ignore the groans of your friends and room mates and put this gem on the old DVD player, anyway.
6. Plan 9 From Outer Space– Circa 1959. I usually like to separate movies by before 1980 and after 1980 because the differences between “bad” and “good” have a lot to do with production value and special effects, which often don’t stand up to the test of time. However, Plan 9 had almost no production value (or value at all for that matter). My favorite part is when the cop uses the tip of his gun to scratch an itch… now that’s damn good acting! Move over Orson Welles!
5. Night of the Comet- Circa 1984. This is one of my all time favorite bad movies. It’s got so much to offer with a story about the wiping out of the human race, zombie’s, 80’s montage featuring Cyndi Lauper and quotes like “Daddy would’ve gotten us Uzis!”. This movie has it all. It was really difficult to find a clip worth posting, but I need to show the true idiocy of the movie by showing a bit of what makes this movie so wonderfully terrible. Plus there’s a cheerleader!
4. Killer Clowns from Outer Space- Circa 1988- This is one of the most popular bad movies. I rarely have a hard time finding someone who’s seen it, or at least heard of it. This film has more than just a ridiculous theme (killer clowns) they had to take it one step further and make it a “space” movie, too! I gotta tell you, the theme song is on my iPod because it’s so awesome. I didn’t even have to search for a clip, the first one I found was so outstanding, that I just decided to use it. In your own time, I suggest looking for the song “Killer Clowns from Outer Space” by The Dickies, because it’s amazing (it’s actually my current ring tone.)
3. The Stuff- Circa 1985. The Stuff is a heart-wrenching movie about true love and the pursuit of happiness. I wish that were true… but not really, because this movie is a heap of fun as is. This satirical gem is about an ice cream company that is selling a strange sort of live goo that turns people into zombies if they eat it. Director Larry Cohen certainly did not disappoint with this film that is a mixture of social commentary, action movie and zombie extravaganza.
2. Frankenhooker- Circa 1990. When a poor medical school drop-out loses his fiance in a tragic accident, he is left with no choice but to do what any innocent, love-stricken man would do: sew other people’s body parts together in order to save the only part of her that really mattered… her head! When he brings his creation to life, hilarity ensues with his home-made “Frankenhooker” on the loose. This movie is such a great watch, I highly recommend it to anyone with bad taste.
1. Brain Damage– Circa 1988. Another comic gem brought to you by the makers of Frankenhooker, this film will have your ROFLMOA-ing in no time. One of the best things about this film is the completely absurd voice of the brain starved monster, which I suppose also falls into the category of “mini-monster’s” with the Ghoulies and such. Poor defenseless Brian (the hero of our film) gets stuck with a new pal who is getting him into plenty of trouble, but when he realizes he just can’t get rid of it, terror erupts.
I hope you enjoyed this list of awful yet awesome movies. These are just a few of the films out there that are so bad, they are worth watching. So grab yourself a beer and a bowl of pop corn and camp it in front of the tv for a fun-filled evening of mini-monsters, gore and hilarity to get your Halloween season kicked off in the right way. Enjoy!