Let’s Get LOST: “The Lighthouse”

Awesome.  Things are starting to move along at a good clip.  Last night was chalk full of Jack redemption, jungle bunny Claire, Jacob manipulation, and that super funny Old Spice commercial with that ripped black dude holding an open oyster shell with “two tickets to that show she likes” inside.

Crazy Claire and Jack were the focal points of last night’s episode.  I’m gonna start with Claire cuz she’s just too damn cute for words.

After disabling her +5 Bear Trap of Crippling, “Crazy” Claire dragged a passed out and bloody legged Jin to her fortress of insanity.  If you ask me, it’s safe to say that she’s a few swallows short of a flying coconut.  Her house looked like a cluster-fuck of macabre baby stuff (there was a makeshift baby with a rotted animal skull sleeping in a crib) and weapons of mass destruction.  But I guess that sort of thing will happen when you’ve spent 3 years alone on an island looking for the child you thought you lost, while trying to smite those you think took him.  Claire enacted some wild vengeance upon one of the Temple Others by use of a swift axe blow to the bread basket.  To be perfectly honest, I didn’t think she was going to do it.  But man, she’s totally scoring cool points with the more insane shit she does.

Aside from learning that Claire will destroy Kate if she finds out Kate’s been raising Aaron for the past 3 years (and that Claire’s “friend” is Not Locke), there really wasn’t much else in the episode Claire centric.  She did show off a rather gnarly hot poker scar though.  On to Jack.

Some cool stuff happened with both Jungle Jack AND Sideways Jack.  Jungle Jack was lured to a new island locale (aptly named The Lighthouse) by a Jacob-coaxed Hurley.  How they found that place by following Hurley’s arm-sweat soaked directions, I will never know.  But find it they did, and even had time to say “how’s it goin'” to Kate.  A rather cleaver remark was made once they found the structure.  Jack:  “how come we’ve never seen this thing before?”.  Hurley’s response:  “maybe it’s cuz we weren’t looking for it.”.  I smiled at that.

The two of them made it to the top of the monolith to find yer usual old-school light house stuff (mirrors; a telescope; a shit ton of names next to the degree numbers).  When Jack spotted his old house reflecting at him in the mirrors while the dial was on his name/number, he damn near exploded.  Well, he sort of did.  In a blind rage he shattered the mirrors, and the 28 years of future good luck he was going to have, all in one shot.  Man, if he pulled that crap around me, he’d be tossed in the time-out room faster than you can say destiny.  But I’m sure all will be well in the world of Jungle Jack as soon as he’s done looking out at the ocean.

Sideways Jack was more lovey-dovey than bitch ‘n break.  In the Back to the Future style time tangent, S Jack has a kid named David who kicks ass on the piano.  Only problem is S Jack is to his son like Christian was to Jack; the kid doesn’t want to be seen as a failure.  S Jack makes quick work of that with a talk and some pizza after helping his mommy find Christian’s Last Will (Claire was mentioned in it, FYI).  Oh yeah, S Jack discovered his appendix scar.  He’s told by is mother that he got it when he was like 7, however us fans know how that truly happened.

There are a few good questions that need to be addressed concerning this David character.  Who is the kid’s mother?  Libby?  Shannon?  Juliette?  And for that matter, is he destined to be island bound?  I only ask cuz why would they suddenly introduce this dude right after Jacob tells Hurley “someone is coming to the island.”?  At first I thought this mysterious island goer would be Desmond.  But all that got pissed away when depressed David sulked his way onto the screen.

Roughly 13 episodes remain yet my LOST induced headaches continue.  I know that most questions will be answered by the show’s end.  But throwing more at us this late in the series is a super ass hole thing to do.  I’m still wondering if that damned Hurley Bird thing will get explained!  Sadly I know it won’t, mostly because I want it to be.

Check out Oh Mars‘ take on last night, then get back to typing up reports for the job you should be doing.

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