Cyborgs And Sticky Floors: Defender’s Day At The Movies

It was a rather warm Friday afternoon.  The air in “New Camelot” was that of a Louisiana swamp-land.  He emerged from the room of cold, bombarded by a wall of humidity, but this would not stop our beloved warrior.  There was an adventure ahead of him, and he knew it must be accomplished.  Defender needed to see Terminator: Salvation.

hr_terminator_salvation_poster

Due to a combination of almost getting slain in a near car crash, trekking through the city of Boston to support a family member, and annoying drunkards asking me pointless questions, I was unable to join my crew for their assault on the new Terminator movie.  All was not lost, you see.  The night became a raging good time with some old friends, ending with some glorious Taco Bell, Ghostbusters, and Showgirls.

To rectify the lost movie going experience, I decided to take a mid-day trip to the theater (after I rose from my alcohol induced slumber, of course).  With a much needed Double Quarter Pounder resting comfortably in my stomach, I buckled-up for what I knew in my bones would be a spectacular film.  Oh how right I was.

Being an uber fan of the Terminator series, I walked into this installment with very low expectations.  Tampering with any movie franchise usually ends up bad, so I didn’t want to get my hopes up only to have them shattered before my eyes.  Thanks to McG, that didn’t happen.  This movie was super amazing.  Everything from the cinematography to the many subtle homages had me as giddy as a school girl at prom season.  It had everything!  Explosions, crazy effects, mushroom clouds, air battles, robots engulfed in fire, stuffs getting blowed up…..I’m getting excited just remembering them!

Danny Elfman manned the musical helm this time around.  As soon as his name appeared on the screen I was waiting to hear something from a Tim Burton movie.  That didn’t happen.  He gave us his best work to date, without a doubt.  It was like listening to the original theme with new ears.  Thumbs up Master Elfman.  Getting to hear “You Could Be Mine” from Guns N’ Roses made the experience even more of a face melter.

terminator-salvation_180There were a few minor things with the movie that confused me.  If you are familiar with the first Terminator, then you will remember Kyle Reese  explaining to Sarah Connor the evolution of the cyborgs.  He said that the early models (T-600 if I recall) had rubber skin and were easy to spot, but the newer ones had sweat, hair, and blood which made them very hard to identify.  T4 (as I will forever call it) had a few of those rubber-bots.  The characters also discovered Skynet’s plans to build a T-800 (which I believe was Arnold’s model in T3).  What confused me was when Marcus Wright was shown to be part machine.  They say that they had never seen Terminators with organs, so is this movie introducing those we have come to know?  Is Marcus some crazy new creation that we aren’t supposed to be familiar with and is a special case?  Help me out, cuz this was the only problem I had with the film.

Christian Bale as John Connor was perfect.  He delivered, despite his goofy manner of speech and inability to get the audience to take his angry voice seriously.

Relative newcomer Anton Yelchin WAS young Kyle Reese.  It was as if McG took Michael Biehn and made him go for a ride on that backwards merry-go-round from Something Wicked This Way Comes. Yelchin nailed the little facial expressions as well as the way “old” Reese carried himself.  If only they showed young Reese making plastique.  That would’ve been the cherry on the sunday.

I could goo-goo and ga-ga for hours over the many, many, many awesome things I loved about this movie; time that I just can’t afford to waste on such an amazing day.  So in closing, I would love to leave you all by demanding that you watch T4 until your eyeballs start to bleed.  It kicks you in the ass while dumping molten metal in your crotch, and leaves you wanting more.  Well done McG….well done.  \m/

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