Suicide While Watching “WATCHMEN”


While poking around the interwebs before work last night, I stumbled across a small, but powerful, bit of nerd news.  Since its release on March 6th, WATCHMEN hasn’t been living up to the hype (as sad as it is for me to report).  Either super fans didn’t like the cinematic translation, or angry parents flipped out after bringing their children to a film with lots of sex and waist hot dogs.  It seems one moviegoer took the phrase “die-hard fan” a little too seriously.


“A man shot himself to death in a Eugene movie theater just after midnight Monday morning.

Police say about 10 patrons were in an auditorium at Regal Cinemas watching the movie “Watchmen.” About midway through the film some of the moviegoers told the manager they heard a “popping” noise like a gunshot. A 24-year-old man was found in the rear of the auditorium with a gunshot wound to the head.

Police say the man shot himself and was dead when they arrived.

The patron closest to the man was sitting two rows away.”

First off, “only 10 patrons were in the auditorium”?  That boils my piss!  WATCHMEN was a spectacular movie, and should be sucking down cash like Al Bundy with Whoppers at Burger King.  Secondly, I didn’t realize just how devoted Alan Moore’s readers were.  The nut didn’t even see the end of the movie!  Granted, he most likely would have ended himself after seeing the different ending, but he still could’ve shown a little respect to all of the folks who worked on the picture.  I’d be super pissed to know that some guy hated my movie enough to kill himself mid-way through.  But here we have some dildo (probably full of self hate, and possibly a couple months behind on his rent) that took the graphic novel to heart, got a hair across his ass when he heard of the movie, then decided to make a statement.  Well pall, here’s the only statement you left, “wah wah, boo hoo, emo emo emo, Alan Moore is God.”

If these are a sign of things to come with the future of movies, I sure don’t want to be in the theater for Where The Wild Things Are.  Some “Thing-Freak” will probably snap and take out the whole crowd.  And I thought I was a harsh critic.

One Response to Suicide While Watching “WATCHMEN”

  1. Oh Mars says:

    Currently there’s no word on why the man killed himself. There’s a possibility it had something to do with the movie, maybe it’s theme of potential nuclear war, but I doubt it. Maybe he was just wanted to kill himself in a room with strangers. I’m sure his suicidal issues were completely separate from the film. But unless he left some kind of message behind, we’ll never know. Whether he was an Alan Moore fanboy or just a depressed guy going through some shit, RBM pours one out for him.

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