KILL KILL KILL; Worst Idea Ever Gets Much Worse

jaden-smith-big

It’s 11:48 on Tuesday night and I’m glad I have a buzz on as I write this. RBM reported back in November that Will Smith’s son, Jaden, would be starring in a remake of The Karate Kid. I stayed inside for a month, went through my memory shoebox, and tried to forget about it. Unfortunatley, EW hates me and is reporting that:

Jackie Chan will take on Pat Morita’s Mr. Miyagi role in Sony Pictures’ remake of The Karate Kid. The movie stars 10-year old Smith (The Pursuit of Happyness), who is the son of Will Smith and Jada Pinkett Smith, and will be directed by Harold Zwart (The Pink Panther 2).

I got to touch the hole in Jackie Chan’s head after a taping of The View once in Manhattan, but that doesn’t make up for the fact that he’s a shitty actor. Any moron who has seen Karate Kid knows that the Miyagi role is more than just a karate mentor-gimmick. Lord knows that Chan cannot pull off the heartbreaking Miyagi Anniversary scene. And lest not forget that Pat Morita was nominated for an Academy Award. *Groan* It’s now 12:09 and I haven’t even mentioned how excited I am that Harold Zwart, the celebrated director of Pink Panther 2, will be helming a remake of my favorite movie! Who could ask for anything more! It’s like I’m already bent over and then Harold Zwart has showed up for seconds! Karate Kid FTW!!!

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