Monday Morning Wood

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Cinemablend has posted their review of the season 5 premiere of Lost. I aint afraid of no spoiler so I read it and I think Lost fans are going to go to bed happy on the 21st. Spoiler Alert: Sawyer doesn’t wear a shirt! 😉

EW has some new photos from Where the Wild Things Are, Public Enemies, Wolverine, Terminator: Salvation, and the remake of Taking of Pelham 1-2-3, one of my favorite 70s crime movies. My good friend Denzel Washington suggested that for the remake, his character should be demoted from cop to dispatch operator. So that way,

”He’s not a guy familiar with weapons,” explains Washington. ”So when he’s put in the middle of this hostage situation, he’s in over his head.”

Why does a dispatcher get put into the middle of a hostage situation? My mother is a police dispatcher and I never realized how dangerous her job is. But if I was the perp, I’d be shitting myself.

Remember playing with Hot Wheels as a kid? They were pretty fun and made great skateboards for when GI Joe had to go on those extreme missions. Variety reports that Mattel feels a Hot Wheels movie would be a lucrative idea. Barry Waldo, VP of marketing for Mattel, states that they would not be making the cars characters (like in the Pixar smash Cars, which shit money). Instead, I think they should make a movie called Hot Soap Box Kids.

Pour one out for: Jett Travolta, son of John, who was found dead in a bathtub in his family’s Florida home on Friday morning. Jett suffered from Kawasaki disease, which leads to inflammation of the blood vessels in young children. I could never make a joke about parents having to bury their child but read more here.

StarWars.com posted their Best of 2008 list and at number three is the resurfacing of Rusty Miller, who wrote “The Jedi Master’s Quizbook” in 1983 at age 11. Since the publication of the book, Rusty is living in the real world, has gone on to work as a paramedic, and is currently pursuing a master’s degree in emergency and disaster management, completely turning his back on Star Wars. Even has a wife. Fucking loser.

The whistling orangutan will change everything you thought about orangutans.

Funny or Die has posted a classic clip from the sitcom Mystique and Me, starring Jerry O’Connell. You remember this show, right? This nug is from the episode where Mystique is preggers and pissed because her fetus won’t shape-shift. I saw it on Nick at Nite a few months back.

The sweetest Alien toy in years is now available for preorder at Big Bad Toy Store. It’s only $99.99! Ever since I got a desk job, I look at toys in relation to how cool they’re look in my cubicle.

Interview has a great interview (no shit!) up with director John Waters, who I’m not a huge fan of but I think he’s an interesting cat. Did you know he used to have his own show on Court TV? Me neither:

I had a show on Court TV called ‘Til Death Do Us Part. Every week it was about real married couples who killed one another. I was kind of like the Rod Serling or the Alfred Hitchcock, making snide comments. I was the narrator, too. I’m right in the middle of negotiating the renewal of the show, but the channel is now called truTV. When they called me up, I was like, “Is it all about Truman Capote now?”

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