Trailer for “ROBOCOP 2014″: Your Move, Creep.

September 6, 2013

Robocop_2

Well I’ll be damned.  They actually went through with it.  They’ve gone and remade yet another movie from our childhood.  I thought this one was just going to be another rumor that would fizzle out.  Nope.  This is for real, folks.  ROBOCOP got remade….and we have the trailer. Read the rest of this entry »


Defender Discusses “DAYBREAKERS”

October 24, 2012

Let’s face it, vampires have been done to death these days.  Everything from turning them into sparkly sissies, giving them an HBO series, and having them go toe-to-toe with a former president has been churned out of tinsel-town lately.  Frankly, I’m sick of it.  They’re everywhere these days and they totally suck…and not in the awesome way.  I was beginning to lose hope that there would never be a truly great vampire movie again.  DAYBREAKERS changed all that. Read the rest of this entry »


The Hobbit: A Most Expected Face-Melting

December 21, 2011

It certainly makes my nerd balls swell to know that this film finally got it’s shit together.  Let’s just hope we get to see it before that 2012 prediction comes to fruition.  Damn Mayans.  They should just buy a new damn calendar, if you ask me.  Those things are quite cheap and have cute pictures of cats doing adorable things on them.


BANEs, Bats, & Cats: Trailer For “The Dark Knight Rises”

December 21, 2011

By now the entire world has been made aware of this trailer’s existence.  But I am mostly to blame for the lack of promptness and all around good humor that you all have come to expect from RBM.  Lots of booze and not enough sleep will cause such problems.  Read the rest of this entry »


Trapped Under Ice: Red-Band Trailer For “The Thing” Prequel

September 20, 2011

Since most dopes think this is a sequel/remake, I’m not as bothered as I should be (mostly due to the fact that I have a brain in my head and know my Carpenter movies).  Even the fact that it was created by the same shit-heads that made the atrocious Dawn of the Dead remake hasn’t deterred me.  This looks like it’s going to be fantastic as hell.  Read the rest of this entry »


Celebrating 20 Years Of Hillarity, Hair-balls, and Hoek

August 11, 2011

That’s right  folks, it was 20 years ago today that Canadian animator/maniac John Kricfalusi warped the minds of 10-12 year olds across the globe.  Never before had toilet humor and outlandish violence been captured so beautifully as it was with the help of an asthma-hound chihuahua and a semi-retarded cat.  But if it wasn’t for the disturbing nonsensical chaos that Ren & Stimpy provided, I probably wouldn’t be the jolly ole Viking that I am today. Read the rest of this entry »


Song Of The Day: 6/20/2011

June 20, 2011

“Weird Al” Yankovic:  Perform This Way

I’ve always been more of an old-school Al fan.  Even though his recent albums are funny as all hell, I still don’t dig the bands he’s been parodying.  But this new video makes my nostalgic heart feel like it’s stuck in a closet with Vanna White every time I hear this killer new shit from that lanky madman with the curly hair.  He managed to rock my face off and disturb me for life all in the span of 15 seconds.  Well played good sir.   Well played.


New Terminator Trailer

June 20, 2011

It’s going to be hard for them to top T2, but if you ask me this T-X looks to be one bad ass mother eff.


Song Of The Day: 5/20/2011

May 20, 2011

“Macho Man” Randy Savage:  Speaking from the Heart

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHH YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAH!!!!


Pour One Out For: “Macho Man” Randy Savage 11/15/1953 – 5/20/2011

May 20, 2011

While a slew of morons are plastering religious nonsense all over the internet, some rather shocking information elbow-dropped me into my own religious experience….and not in a good way.  It seems the greatest, most meticulous, professional wrestler has signed his contract to wrestle for eternity in the halls of Valhalla.  Today, “Macho Man” Randy Savage passed away.  TMZ has all the details that are known as of now. Read the rest of this entry »


Song Of The Day: Friday The 13th Edish

May 13, 2011

Alice Cooper:  He’s Back (The Man Behind The Mask)

How could I let a Friday the 13th slip by without listening to this song?  Sure it’s from one of the lesser Friday movies, but you simply can’t ignore how awesomely amazing this tune is.


Thursday Throwbacks: PHOTON

May 12, 2011

Remembering things that half the world forgot is one of my many mutant powers (being able to spot a female nipple in one frame of a movie is another one).  Friends contact me at all hours of the night when they get stuck trying to remember something from their child hood, and 90% of the time I have the answer.  It’s that fiendish 10% that gets under my skin.  Every now and then my brain only shows me a few images of things that I should know instantly.  That REEEALLY pisses me off.  But I’m a very patient man.  I know that if I wait long enough (and drink enough booze) the veil will be lifted and the knowledge will be mine.  Today’s “Throwback” took me over 20 damn years, mostly due to a word that will forever haunt me…..PHOTON. Read the rest of this entry »


“THOR”: Norse Gods And A Demented Defender

May 7, 2011

I know what you’re thinking.  “This guy has problems.”  Well, if by problems you mean a strong desire to be awesome, then you’re correct.  Not many people have the balls to fully embrace something they love to the extent that I do, and that’s a shame.  Why wouldn’t you want to absorb might, strength, and power into your daily lives?  The Norsemen had the right idea, so grow a pair and live life the Viking way!  MARVEL studios has been doing just that, and THOR is all the proof you need. Read the rest of this entry »


America…FUCK YEAH!

May 2, 2011

By now, most of you know that the jerkface who caused 911 was killed last night.  The government would have you believe it was due to a bullet in the brain by a special ops dude.  Close.  The bullet was actually a 2×4 and the special ops dude was Hacksaw Jim Duggan.  HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!


Crazy Crap: Portal Kombat!!

April 28, 2011

No, this isn’t a real game.  But if it were, it would be the best game of all time….just as long as Kratos shows up to dish out some pain to those disturbingly cute robots.  They seriously need a good roughing up.


11-11-11 Will Be Chalk Full Of “Immortals”

April 28, 2011

I haven’t heard anything about this movie until today.  As awesome as this looks, it pains me that they totally ripped off the ranger’s weapon from the Dungeons & Dragons cartoon.  I like to think this dude plucked it from the charred remains of Hank then had his way Sheila “the thief”.  Read the rest of this entry »


“Rise Of The Planet Of The Apes” Trailer

April 14, 2011

It’s been a good 10 years since Tim Burton grabbed the world by the scruff and drove it face-first into a steaming pile of monkey spunk that was his remake of the classic Planet of the Apes.  Some have forgiven the dreary director, but I for one have not.  Sure, his rendition was closer to the story the original that Apes was based off of.  That doesn’t give him the right to do what he did.  The stink of Paul Giamatti will never go away, despite the hours of vigorous scrubbing. Read the rest of this entry »


Pour One Out For: Scott Columbus

April 5, 2011

According to Ross “The Boss” Friedman as well as Scott’s girlfriend of over three years, Scott Columbus died yesterday, April 4th, at the age of 54.

Read the rest of this entry »


Thundercats….WHOAAAAAA!!!

April 4, 2011

Originally I thought this was just going to be a re-telling of my favorite childhood cartoon.  I was bullshit when I thought Lion-O was going to stay looking as a child.  But if this is what I think, and it’s taking place well after the T-Cats have crashed on 3rd Earth, I’m going to be one happy Reptilian.  This looks amazing.

Update: Read the rest of this entry »


Volstagg: The Not-Quite-Voluminous

March 17, 2011

“DAMN THEE, DIET!”

There is much excitement in the nerd community surrounding the new THOR movie that’s due out soon.  As awesome as the trailer is, a “small” problem has been brought to my attention.  Turns out the portly powerhouse Volstagg has been poorly cast.  I know, I know.  How hard could it be to cast a large and in-charge warrior from the halls of Asgard?  Harder than you’d think, apparently. Read the rest of this entry »


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