Caught In The Middle: An “X-Men:First Class” Review

One would assume that since MARVEL now has the power to make their own films they’d be able to make flawless comic book movies.  Not so.  Many would simply forget about the Fantastic Four flub, Ghost Rider‘s gaffe, and Electra‘s err…not me.  A good handful of spot on renditions have come to the screen to prove that it can be done correctly.  It just sucks when someone only goes half way.  I just didn’t think the people behind X-Men:  First Class would be in that category.

I’m not going to ramble on about what I liked, what sucked, and what the movie’s about.  This is a movie that everyone is going to have different takes on…plus, I’m still debating how I feel about it.  What I will tell you is this, if you look past all the nerderific mess-ups, First Class is a great movie.  Some of the stuff that really ground my geek gears I later found to actually have some book relevance, though a good portion still pissed me off.  It was almost like the writers cut the script apart, tossed in some horrible jokes about well-known character stuff, added characters hardly anyone heard about but had similar powers as other well known ones, dumped it all in a hat, then hired two different directors to take turns drawing scenes.  One of them totally had sexy lady luck on his side while the other reached his hand into a cereal box full of shit.

A ton of stuff has happened in the MARVEL world since I went on comic hiatus, so much so that things could be put in a film that I would have no idea what it is.  But who wants that kind of movie?  Personally, I like watching the stuff I know and love.  I don’t need a prick who already wiped his balls with the X-Men story to lay his art-faggy mitts on another film, no matter how minor his part is in the creation process (I’m talking about YOU, Bryan Singer!).  Jon Favreau and Kenneth Branagh demonstrated that a fucking awesome comic-to-movie translation CAN be done.  I don’t see why people have such a hard time with the X-Men franchise.  ALL THE STORY YOU NEED CAN BE FOUND AT A COMIC BOOK STORE!!!

If you haven’t seen ‘em by now, here’s some of the trailers:

Mystique

Beast

Havok

Banshee

Official trailer

Should you happen to have $11 and a few hours to kill, check out this film.  I hope you are left with a more concrete feeling than I was.  Perhaps after a few more viewings I’ll be able to decide.

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