Girl Loses Virginity, Texts Dad

Elizabeth Frisinger, an 18 year old high school senior in Cleveland, went on a class trip, boned down on the beach, and it was so Gr8 that she became momentarily retarded. In a forehead-slapping-moment of epic stupidity, Elizabeth accidentally texted her dad with the good news. Her super-hip dad was able to decipher Lizzy’s text-language and booked her a flight home. Below is a school photo of Liz, at the time of this posting, no photo has been released of the lucky guy. The only way this situation could get any worse for Elizabeth is if a photo of the dude is released and he’s wicked ugly. The Internet rules.

Case Closed? Scott Ruffalo Shot Hisself?

The shooting of Scott Ruffalo has been ruled an accident by authorities and the suspect in custody has been released.

Attorney Ronald Richards said he presented evidence to detectives during a five-hour meeting Tuesday night that proved Adham did not shoot Scott Ruffalo early Dec. 1. He said Ruffalo’s gunshot wound to the head was self-inflicted — that Adham was essentially a witness to a game of Russian Roulette.

“This was an accidental shooting by someone that plays with guns,” Richards said. He credited police with being “more than impartial with the facts.”

Richards said Adham, a friend of Scott Ruffalo’s, had gone to the hairdresser’s condo to retrieve keys to her sport utility vehicle, then fled the scene.

“A series of wrong decisions starting with her not staying at the scene of the shooting caused an incredible chain reaction of stupidity and bad luck,” Richards said. He said she received poor legal advice from other attorneys before her surrender. (Yahoo)

Well I guess this is sort of good news. Saying someone died by accident sounds better than someone died by being shot in the head.

Series Review of The Wire

The new episode of /Film’s podcast is a three hour long discussion about The Wire, the greatest show in American history. /Film’s Dave, Devindra, and Adam reflect with television critics Alan Sepinwall and Myles McNutt (what a crazy name) pick apart every season of the show, it’s themes, messages, and storytelling. I got into The Wire pretty late in the game, but once I finished the fifth and final season, I knew that television had now been ruined for me. No show will ever come close to The Wire‘s level of characterization, emotion, and aim. Check, please.

The breadth and ambition of “The Wire” are unrivaled and that taken cumulatively over the course of a season — any season — it’s an astonishing display of writing, acting and storytelling that must be considered alongside the best literature and filmmaking in the modern era. – Tim Goodman, critic – San Francisco Chronicle

They discuss this famous scene during the podcast, which sums up the entire series.

Song of the Day: Q-Tip “Won’t Trade”

New daily (hopefully) feature brought to you by RBM, with the intention of broadening your musical horizons or just tipping you off on some dope shit. Yes, I stole this idea from NPR, but unlike their choices RBM’s will be enjoyable everyday. It wouldn’t be terrible to write a comment either. We like to discuss music, or if you’re like me, get drunk and forcibly lecture others on the awesomeness of musicians like David Bromberg (I will post some Brom in the future, don’t worry).

Is It Too Soon to Whisper Oscar?

Kevin James, I love you, I think you’re hysterical. I want to hang out with you, maybe go get some pizza, play a little Scene-It. There’s a block of King of Queens on when I come home from work and it’s the best thing ever to be welcomed home by you (just like in the theme song!). But are you really starring in a movie about a mall cop? There’s going to be so many fat-guy-running gags in this, I feel it in my gut.

Dominos anyone?

SDCC Watchmen Footage Will Make You Cry

Although there’s tons of bullshit surrounding this movie (legal battles, Giant Squid debate), after watching this footage from SDCC, it’s hard not to predict that this is movie is going to blow us all away. I could watch the Comedian get thrown out that window all day long.

Jon Stewart Schools Mike Huckabee

There is an old saying that goes “opinions are like assholes, everyone has one and they all stink.” In this case, only Mike Huckabee’s stinks. .. I probably could have chosen a better anecdote to illustrate my point while presenting a clip arguing the merits of gay marriage, but whatever.

Jon Stewart’s opinion is better than Mike Huckabee’s.